You want to talk about Eric Ivory's parental heritage? Go ahead. Feel like calling his girlfriend ugly? Knock yourself out.
If you want to rip on his vision or intelligence, then give it your best. After all, he's probably heard just about every insult you can come up with.
So say what you will because it never affects Ivory. It can't.
It's part of the skill set he needs to fulfill his dream of becoming an NBA referee.
Admit it, you find his dream occupation just as strange as I do. It's hard to believe somebody would want a job where hundreds or thousands spend a couple of hours criticizing every decision you make.
Frankly, it would drive me crazy because we all know the referees are right 95 percent of the time, even though we act like it's less than 50 percent.
"You just block it out," said Ivory, who lives in Plano and works at a major telecom company. "I played basketball in high school and college and I was always pretty even- keeled. It's pretty amusing – the things people say.
"It's like being a player. If you're really focused on the game, then you don't hear what's being said in the stands. Sometimes, in one of the small 2A or 3A towns, you might hear some people with funny accents, but that's about it."
OK, then what about the coaches complaining from start to finish? Surely, you can't ignore them?
"You can't take it personally," he said. "You have to let them vent, and at a certain point, you look at them and they know that's enough. They'll take it as far as you let them go. I've always believed that you let coaches eject themselves."
Ivory, 38, a graduate of South Oak Cliff, learned to play basketball on asphalt courts and sticky recreation centers in Oak Cliff. He played point guard and helped the Golden Bears advance to the 1988 state tournament as a senior, where they lost to Fort Worth Dunbar.
Then he played four seasons at Southeastern Oklahoma State before joining the real world.
After more than a decade of playing in highly competitive amateur leagues, Ivory reluctantly came to the realization that he had lost a step. But he wanted to remain close to the sport he loved, so five years ago he decided to become a referee.
He's spent the past two seasons refereeing high school games as well as Division II and junior college games in Texas, Oklahoma and Louisiana.
It's hardly a glamorous second job, but it's part of the process for people such as Ivory who would love to one day earn six figures, fly first class and officiate games involving some of the world's greatest athletes.
Ivory's commitment to being an NBA official is the reason he shelled out $500 to officiate two games in a three-day NBA Development League referee tryout camp, which began Friday in suburban Atlanta.
Perform well enough at the camp, and Ivory could be selected to officiate games in the NBA's Developmental League or the WNBA. That's the best-case scenario. At worst, he wants to take the constructive criticism he'll receive and improve.
The goal: to be an NBA official in two years.
No, he hasn't been dissuaded by the gambling scandal involving former official Tim Donaghy, who resigned from the NBA after 13 seasons last July. Donaghy has pleaded guilty to felony conspiracy charges that he provided inside information on NBA games and is awaiting sentencing.
While Ivory didn't grow up wanting to be Dick Bavetta or Danny Crawford, he hadn't found anything to adequately replace the adrenaline rush from playing basketball until he became an official.
"I just like being part of the game because it's exciting when the crowd is into the game and they're reacting – whether they think it was a good call or a bad call," he said. "All eyes are on you when the whistle blows. As long as you call what you see and you're not out there guessing, then it's fun."
Even if the fans occasionally say naughty things about your mother.
