It’s only three words. But it strikes fear into the hearts of 50 percent of football players. The other half barely breaks a sweat.

Six minute mile.

I don’t know how it started, but somehow football coaches believe that a legitimate test of athletic prowess is the ability to run a mile in six minutes or less. Bo Schembechler wrote about it in a book once and now it seems every coach does it. I blame Bo.

Here’s the thing about the six minute mile- if at any time anyone on the football field has to run a mile non-stop, something has gone horribly wrong. It’s the same reason I always thought the 40-yard dash was a deceptive statistic for lineman as well. Lineman rarely have to run 40 yards at a time. Tell me how fast a lineman comes off the ball, or if he can get around the corner in front of his running back on a counter play. But 40 yards straight ahead? Not interested.

The first time we ran it was in high school, on the first day of camp.

The first group to go was the receivers, defensive backs and quarterbacks. The little guys. They have long bodies with fast-twitch muscles. Their bodies were made to run.

The next group was the linemen. The hogmollies. They have big, slow-twitch muscles. Their bodies are made to recline.

Let me preface this story by saying that running and I do not get along. Never have seen eye-to-eye, and never will. We remain enemies to this day. I understand running, I just choose not to accept it.

My first 6-minute mile I was compelled to actually try to make it in time.

The trick to the six minute mile, I was told, is pacing. Pace yourself. Don’t try to kill yourself. It’s not a sprint, it’s a marathon, they said. The trouble is, the pace you have to set just to hit the 6:00 mark is 90 seconds per lap. A lap is 440 feet, once around a standard track. In 90 seconds. One lap. That, my friends, is not a marathon, that is a sprint.

The little guys ran it without breaking a sweat.

The fat guys nearly died. Nowhere else on the field was the difference between “skilled” players and “non-skilled” players more evident.

The first time I ran it I didn’t die, but I was praying for death about halfway through. Didn’t even come close. I knew then and there that the 6:00 mark was going to elude me my entire life. Throughout high school, and into college.

In college the stakes were higher. Fail to run the 6:00 mile in college and you have to get up and run it again every day until you make it. Fortunately, they tell you to stop showing up at the crack of freaking dawn once two-a-days end or I’d still be showing up at 5 AM.

Brian is Creative Services Director for FOX 11and My Tucson TV-18.